Confession: I voted for Ralph Nadar in 2000. And Jill Stein in 2012. And Jill Stein again in 2016. The day after the election in November of 2016, I remember that feeling of shock and despair when it finally sunk in that Donald Trump was going to be our president…

A time traveler’s journal — I confess I invented a time machine for but one purpose: to bring the sexiest woman of all time into the present day in order to fulfill my greatest fantasy. No, I’m not talking about Cleopatra or Marylin Monroe or even the 1987 version of Cindy Crawford. …

Fifty Shades of False Hope — E. L. James is the reason I’ve written four novels nobody will ever read, and why I will probably waste the next year of my life writing another one. My sister’s friend John worked for Penguin Random House at the time Fifty Shades of Grey made the leap from self-published…

Chronicles of a delivery boy (inspired by true events) — While in college, I had a summer job working as a delivery boy at a deli. It was boring work, but it had its perks. One of our regular customers was a boutique called Fantasy Lingerie, where the hot women who worked there actually modeled the garments for you. …

Without Bill Cosby, of Course Think about it. What could be a greater punishment for his horrific deeds than taking away the shiniest piece of his legacy? But we have to hurry. He’s not long for this world, and he’s already almost blind. The Cosby Reboot wouldn’t just be about…

You heard it here first: the world is on fire. And it’s our fault. We’re in the middle of a global heatwave that isn’t going to end when summer does. In India, temperatures are reaching 122 F, and birds are literally falling out of the sky. California is burning to…

Get on it, Big Tech. Find a need and fill it — It took getting stoned off my ass in the Natural History Museum in London for this vision to permeate my subconscious and manifest in real life. Don’t worry. The Museum was closed, so there were no children around. My buddy works the night shift as a security guard, and he…

I’ve been preparing for a life of living in the past since I was 17 years old. Many people keep diaries, but few are as obsessive about it as I am. In my “jolonel”, as I call it, I have an entry for every single day of my life since…

She’ll turn your snake to stone just by looking at it It was after failing to get an erection during an Eyes Wide Shut sex party that 58-year-old billionaire Maximillian Hannaford III first learned of The Gorgon. Legend has it she runs a secret underground brothel on the Greek Island…